All my friends died, and I have no family. Now final straw... can anyone help?

My friends, all but one died, mostly accidents, car, motorcycle, medication mistake, doctor error, heart problem, suicides. I also have lost my whole family to cancer. When people say "Don't kill yourself because people who love you will suffer" I understand that but no one loves me, there is no one left, except one friend and he is just with me because he feels sorry for me, he has even said that, even though he pretended to be joking-and yes he is really my friend but I'm smart and I do know when comments are based in fact. The other day he heard his young cousin died from an accidental gunshot. Suddenly I feel worse than I ever did when my friends and family died. I just want people to stop dying, I feel somehow responsible for the whole world...I'm so scared about all the events in the world that are terrible, that they are leading to something worse...why can't something be done to stop these things? I just want to love everyone so much and show them hope and help every second, but so many people are mean to me. What's the point of me continuing to go through all this strife? I really cannot handle much more and I am feeling really alone. I really love God but I'm afraid he has more important things to do right now than tend to me, for I'm not feeling any answers from Him now, I am worried about myself, but I cannot afford to go to a counselor. I haven't been called or contacted or texted by a real person in over 6 months besides the obligatory comments from my one friend. I feel guilty that no one cares for me and I wonder what I did to deserve everyone I love dying. I'm not even shocked anymore when I get the news. Does anyone have any advice? Please be kind...thank you so much for looking.